Happy Halloween

Halloween has ALWAYS been my favorite holiday. Whether it was the dressing up, or the taboo candy grubbing, I don't know. Somewhere in my mid 20s or 30s, I lost the urge. I went to parties here and there, but once there was no candy involved, and no mama to make me a cool costume, I guess it lost its flair. Last year, I decided I wanted that MOJO back, so I had my first party in 20 years.  The last party I had was 1989, I lived in these dive-y apartments on Powerline in Ft. Lauderdale. We had a pool, I had a blender, my sister brought pina colada and strawberry daiquiri mix and my own father brought the rum. A few friends came over, my roommate and her boyfriend, the neighbors, some random assholes from across the street....We had a blast - I was pretty screaming drunk, but I remember it WAS a fun time...(and no, my car disappearing a few months later had NOTHING to do with this!).

So, it had been a while since I "hosted" a party. I thought, "high time," (not like THAT, you dope), I put the word out, and I'll be damned if a butt load of people showed up, including TWO babies!  It was great! At one point, there were people DANCING in my living room - now that is cool, right?

I have decided to take fate into my hands and do it again tomorrow night.  So far, about 10 or 11 have RSVP'd, so who knows?  I guess I better start thinking about a costume...and some food!  I do have the soundtrack:

a good song for Halloween

another one

another one for you die hard fans

Hope you all have a spooktacular weekend!!

random chance

By some odd chance, a friend posted a video on her Facebook today...and it was the FIRST video I ever saw, back in 1980...on Teletunes, which came BEFORE MTV in Denver, on KBDI, Broomfield Public Access...(MTV later bought Teletunes which I always thought was odd, but now that CORPORATIONS OWN America, I see the logic), and it was all helter skelter and psycho schizoid, new wave, alternative music choices from there....Depeche Mode, Yaz, Soft Cell, Split Enz, New Order, Fiction Factory, Love and Rockets, Tin Tin, Bauhaus, Blancmange, Erasure, Ministry, OMD, Shriekback, Tones on Tail, Icehouse, Japan, Spandau Ballet...god the list goes on....

So what misplaced 4 minute dirge from days gone by do I blame my current music tastes on? Easy:  Classix Nouveaux Guilty - click here to see the video!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCLqj0X2AFk

ok, my Pandora is rockin' a little old school now.  So, what framed YOUR music choices of today?

Walk a mile (or 3.2 to be exact) in MY shoes

Every year, I make it my mission to raise money for the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation. The organization came into existence a year or two before I was diagnosed in 1974, I think, and the walkathons and fundraising began shortly thereafter. I've walked, biked, skied and roller skated more miles, over the last 30-odd years, so that for me to "expect" my name to be included on the "registered walkers" list (not that I am in the general habit of expecting anything), is NOT too much to ask! I register on line months in advance....I do a fancy letter, and I do email campaigns, and I raise a good chunk of money - this year, more than ever before, perhaps in part to my little video

In fact, as an individual, I raise more than many family groups here in Tucson....and they have cute little kids to use as bait. Of course, some raise tons more money, but I guess if you are a lawyer or stockbroker, you have lots of contacts to strongarm ask, and the, there are the corporate teams who have companies who will match their gifts - they always raise a good chunk. Me, I just ask friends and family, most who have supported my cause over the years, and while I don't raise TONS of money, as I said, I do raise more than the average individual walker.

And yet, when I go to check in on the morning of the walk for four years in a row, my NAME was not even on the list as being registerd to walk! What the hell is that? I don't want the plaque they give everyone who raises over $1,000...I have several - I don't need a physical token of appreciation, but I'd just like to have my name on the friggin' list....One year, I WAS on the list, and it showed how much I had raised. The girl checking me in, looks up, her eyes huge, and she said, "Wow, you have raised more than anyone I have checked in today," and then she said, THANK YOU. And THAT, my friends, that was what I was waiting for. Someone to say THANK YOU. Sure, I am raising money to find a cure for a disease I have, so it may seem a little self-serving, but it isn't really. 

See, I could easily make my personal donation of $50 or $100 and feel pretty good, and be done with it.  However, I have the "ability" to USE myself, and raise tens times more...People give to people, not causes, and my friends and family support the JDRF because of ME (or another diabetic they know). It isn't like I make a personal donation of $1,500, but the fact that my begging and pleading with my friends and family result in this chunk of money, that might not otherwise have been raised, and for someone to say, THANK YOU, to me, for doing it, makes it mean so much more.

So, I am walking, again (since they haven't managed to find a cure YET), on November 6th....and we will see, won't we?  Will my name be on the list, or will I have to walk in a snarly mood?

If you are a reader of my blog, and you are one of the people who donated, THANK YOU - I love you, and your support of my cause means more to me than just the monetary value!  If you haven't seen my little video, please check it out...You don't have to donate...just watch it and maybe share it.....like the most awesome blogger in the world, The King of New York Hacks (thanks King!!). If you found my blog thanks to the King's lovely post, welcome...I hope my ranting, raving and griping and moaning don't scare you off.....

And if JDRF can figure out a way to get my name on the LIST, I will even be a happy girl for a few hours!!!  I don't know if I will be able to stand being happy.....but let's not put the cart before the horse....

we're walking, we're walking

I've said it before, but it is worth repeating when it isn't 109 degrees outside.  The desert is really quite a lovely place to live...and while I don't mean it would be a nice place for a summer home (which it isn't, unless you like the heat, and I do, so in my case, I guess it IS a nice place for a summer home), and you sure can't mind the scorpions, the rattlesnakes or the tarantulas (actually The UnMom might actually like the free spider access - getting them in your banana basket it totally up to you, however)! And the snowbirds here rival those in Ft. Lauderdale (although we don't have nearly as many Canadians, not that there is anything wrong with being Canadian, but can you imagine our poor local police trying to profile illegal Canadians?)

Last night, I actually had my camera with me on my 4 mile walk in the canyon.  I have no frickin' idea why these are sideways!  I went through and right side upped them ALL.....what the hell?  but you get the idea.....

what I love most about the saguaro is that is looks like it flipping the world off!!

even arthritic fingers need to give the finger every once in a while

can you see the old man in the rock?

 

It is the small things

The little things in life make me happy:  

~ An extra cherry in my amaretto sour without asking for it and feeling like a 4 year old. 

~ Actually getting NO onions on my burrito when I order "a bean burrito, no onions, please."

~ A free drink coupon from Starbucks after for buying 20 drinks

~ Getting to pick airplane seat from the GOOD seats up front.

~ Waking up before my alarm and feeling good about it.

~ Getting a bear claw, but only being charged for a donut.

~That last $10 donation putting me over the top on my fundraising for JDRF. (Click the link to hear the cheers and yahoos...it is quite gratifying!)

~ My car turning over to 123,456 while I am not in the middle of the construction zone, (though I HAD been up until 123455.5) and staying this way in my garage ALL night, so i can be excited about it again tomorrow

.
and to hear me actually get all verklempt about it, watch the little video...

what are YOU doing??

I am watching the extraction of those trapped miners in Chile, and it is the most amazing wonderful thing I have seen in months and months, maybe years.  If you are not watching this, you should be.  Turn off the politics; turn off the "gnus," turn off your cell phone, take the kids Wii away and WATCH THIS NOW........

Seeing the face of the woman as her husband came out was simply a moment of joy that is so rarely seen, and you really don't want to say you MISSED this because you had something "else" to do...Really?  what ELSE do you have to do?

I am crying, but for the first time in I don't know how long, it is a GOOD cry....

CLICK HERE for a live feed

politics ain't the only thing sucking around here.....

So, my profession, my avocation and my vocation, indeed, my very PASSION has always been theatre...I have two degrees from high fallutin' universities; I have a credible and almost distinguished resume - and am proud of the work I have done all over the country.  However, after a blistering, morale shattering experience last year with a show I directed downtown, I have found myself not even wanting to go see shows, let alone direct anything, and I haven't even auditioned for a show!   I saw a few great shows in NYC last winter, but the few things I have seen locally have all been SO BAD, that I kicked myself for even going!  I thought, I need to snap out of this...I LOVE theatre, so I dragged myself to the theatre last night - it was an "Old Time Radio" style thing.  

I took a friend who had moved to town recently, and we dragged her husband along too.  The group has been doing this radio thing for well over a year, so my expectations were perhaps a bit high, I suppose, but oh MY god, it was just SO sad.....unrehearsed, horrible useless sound effects, weak acting, and an ineffective director sitting in the front row supposedly "cueing" things, when neither actors or sound techs ever looked up from the script!  AND a really really poor script on top of it.....The did a McGee and Molly (?) style thing, but not one of the actors catured the twang and zip of "doll" "sis" "lissen here" "sayyyy..."  it was just so FLAT....

I went to "Old Time Radio" drama, wanting to close my eyes and imagine being cozied up to the wireless, but frankly I was scared to close my eyes for fear I would fall asleep - my FRIEND and her husband did, and the only reason I didn't was because I dug a hole in my arm with my finger nail.  An acquaintance was the playwright...and two guys I have directed in other projects were in it....and they were just horrible!!!!  I ducked out a side door quickly at the end

Sigh...and THAT is the state of the arts in Tucson......

Colorado Dreaming

I lived in Louisiana, Texas, Alberta and New Jersey before my daddy finally settled us for a while in Colorado.  Even though I only officially lived there for about 13 years of my total life, I still consider it my "home." I needed to get a few more frequent flyer points to maintain elite status for 2011, so I decided on a quick trip "home," ostensibly to see the leaves change.  As they say, a picture is worth a thousand words...so here are 8,000 words.....

an icon of my youth....

Typical sky found nowhere else on earth

Maroon Bells near Aspen

Aspen doing their thing

These are actual un-retouched colors

Homeward bound,
I wish I was,
Homeward bound,
Home where my thought's escaping,
Home where my music's playing,
Home where my love lies waiting
Silently for me.*

*Homeward Bound lyrics by Paul Simon

My Soap Box

My first second movie. After working on the original for 8 hours, I decided to redo it.....better now...

Click here to see it on youtube!!

My First Time

his hand slowly traced a path up my thigh.....I felt his warm breath as hee nibbled on my ear lobe

HA....bet you thought you were gonna get a nice, juicy dirty story out of me, didn't ya?

Sorry....but no.  I will save that for my OTHER blog.....THIS is a story about my first migraine. It happened last night and I tell ya, this may have been as a memorable as that OTHER night (March 25, 1985, in case you want to know....)

So, I worked all day yesterday after hiking in the canyon earlier in the day. Nothing unusual about that. I was on the phone for about 1/2 an hour, and then went to the kitchen about 8:30pm. As I was foraging for something to eat, I felt this ache crawl up the back off my neck into my head. I thought maybe I had been on the computer too long, so I popped some aspirin and started washing dishes or SOMETHING....I can't really remember because within a few minutes, the ache, had settled behind my eye and I felt like I was being stabbed.  I stumbled to the bathroom to see if my eye was bleeding (it has before, so it wouldn't have been the first time - only there was no pain the other time).  The white was blood shot, but after being on the computer all day, and me pressing on my eye for the last few minutes, not unusually red...But the pain, my god, the pain!!!  I tested my blood sugar, since usually when something is WRONG with me, everyone blames the diabetes first.  It was a little high, but nothing abnormal...

Then, I started to feel nauseous, and thought "maybe aspirin on an empty stomach is not such a good idea," so I had a bowl of cereal.  That didn't help, and in fact the nausea got worse. I was feeling short of breath, so I sat down and called a friend. She said I might be having a migraine, and suggested having some caffeine and putting an ice bag on my eye, and if it didn't help she'd bring me some migraine pills she had.....I don't like to do caffeine at night, so I decided to just go lie down - though she had warned me she couldn't lie down when she had her migraines....and she was right. The nausea was worse and all my zen breathing couldn't calm my pounding heart, so I got up again.  Now the lights in the kitchen were bothering me too, so I drank some warm Dr Pepper, took a Vicidin, turned out all the lights, and curled up in the arm chair with an ice bag on my head, trying to control my heart beat and breath.Then I waited for the cliff dive of the Vicidin to set in. Usually a 1/2 pill will knock me senseless for 8 hours in about 20  minutes.  An hour later, I FINALLY dropped off.

I woke up around 3, still groggy, but the pain was gone anyway...so I went and got in bed. It took about an hour for me to be able to go back to sleep, so I felt like crap when the alarm went off to go to Pilates. Suffice it to say, I didn't go

I have never felt pain like this in my head in my life. If this is the pain they are talking about in those head ache commercials, then you constant migraine sufferers have my deepest sympathies.  I am  hoping this is a one off abnormality...although, I HAVE noticed some other hormonal changes, like in my skin and hair...this BETTER not be related to MENOPAUSE......


wahhhhhhhh!  Any one else suffer REAL migraines, not those little piddly things most people whine about?

Still Hopin'

Following is my entry to the 2008 "Inspired by Diabetes" Competition sponsored by Lilly. I was inspired by Colin Hay's song "Waiting for My Real Life to Begin" which had been featured on an episode of Scrubs. Here is a link to the song as it was heard on the show..... Scrubs Episode.  This essay won 2nd place nationally, in the Adult Writing portion of the event, and here is the trophy they sent me. I've printed the essay here before, but it still is apropos, I think. Funny how the date on the calendar can change but nothing seems to change..

I was 10 when I was diagnosed with diabetes. The doctors darkly warned me about complications and commanded me to inject insulin, or die. They impressed upon my childish self how difficult my life would be, how I might not have children, and threw in a caution about my shortened life span. However, they said, the cure was "right around the corner" in the next 20 years, but ONLY if I obeyed the rules. If I took care of myself, took my shot, tested my urine and kept my 10 year-old self from candy, then, when that cure came around, I could have my REAL life back.

34 years later, I’m still waiting! And as jaded and wrinkled and arthritic as I am, I still feel 10, only instead of "I HOPE Santa came," it’s "oh my gosh, I HOPE they find the cure!"

Life with diabetes is draining; it sneaks up, taking its slow insidious time. Fortunately for me, this slow depletion of life has forged extraordinary energy and resiliency. The knowledge I've gained “auditioning” doctors, fighting with insurance companies from hell, and doing Cirque du Soleil-worthy acrobatic feats with food, insulin and exercise, allows me to live a full, REAL life.

I have diabetes. I direct, write, teach, I am an outspoken activist. I build model rockets and crochet; I ski and camp. I stay up all night and sleep all day. I’ve traveled in planes, trains, automobiles, boats, and balloons. I eat ice cream AND pizza! If this isn't a real life, then this fake one has been pretty awesome…I’m not sitting here hoping for some cure so my real life can begin, but wouldn’t it be nice?

I'd rather not test my blood. I'd rather not lie awake at night wondering what I'll do and who will take care of me when I get old. I'd rather not dwell on dialysis. I'd rather not scare off another man thanks to everything the pump "attaches" to me. I am staving off kidney disease, cardiovascular disease and amputation, and hope that if a cure does come along, I’ll be healthy enough to receive it.

It is my greatest HOPE that the children of my family and friends never know what laser surgery in the eyeball feels like. I hope they never have to do insulin math to compensate for a sick day or to eat Chinese food. I hope they are never offered a nice, juicy apple at a birthday party, while everyone else eats cake. I hope they never need to test their own blood, or keep horrid jobs just for the insurance!

I hope...I still have a tiny, shimmering chunk of HOPE inside! Life would be different without diabetes, but I know it would be nothing without the people who give my REAL life REAL meaning – the ones who inspire me to keep hoping. So I test, and read up on the latest developments, and raise money for research. And I hope…..

Feeling inspired??  Won't you consider a small donation to the Juvenile Diabetes Research  Foundation? We are walking for a cure, and your support will help fund research to help us....and all the children, of course, but this is about ME...ok...I was a child once, and YES I had diabetes then, TOO...but I wasn't so good at raising money. So now, I am old and not cute, and I need to raise money, so I am not above invoking the pitiful child...Here...do it for HER!  Now stop making me grovel and click this link: 
 
Click to Donate to JDRF

I want a Divorce

i love my family, but dear sweet baby jesus [pun intended, as you will see], I want a Divorce from some of them!  Is that possible?

The trouble began when we invaded Baghdad......but more recently, one silly cousin, we will call her Cherry Bomb, mentioned some Ohhhhh HORRORsss story that "Obama had come out in support of the Muslim worship complex at ground zero" and she posted the little poll about do you support it or not. In response, I posted an actual NEWS story that came out today about how MORE people think Obama is a Muslim than did previously! I mean, come on!  This country is such a bunch of idiots! Ever hear of freedom of religion and separation of church and state?

Cousin K (for KER-AZZZY): "the bigger question is.... who is behind this and where are the funds coming from? makes you wonder huh? and who sold them the property? inquring minds would like to know.. 

ARM (for A Random Moe)  asked: And Pelosi wants to know who we are thats opposing the mosque! LOL

K:  is that woman really in her right mind? she wants to have all the "opposers" investigated and then punished...i know the muslims have the right to worship but why does our government cater to them? and then try to take away all of our Christian rights? all i can say is satan is alive and doing his job well !!

My eyes rolled inside my head and blasted out my nostrils at that point

 

ARM:  They will not humble themselves nor go away quietly...

I threw up a little in my mouth.  I could really no longer hold my tongue, as it was in bleeding shreds in my mouth

SSP :  It has nothing to do with YOUR rights, cousin K, and it takes nothing away from YOU. However, the US constitution guarantees those same rights to OTHER Americans who don't happen to be Christ followers, and, like it or not, there are MILLIONS of tax-paying Muslims in this country. You don't have to like it, but you do have to respect their rights as much as you want them to respect yours! And, ARM, why SHOULD they go away quietly?? They have just as much right to be here as you do!

K: did i say ANYTHING about taking their right to worship away? NO i did not ,i simply said why does our government try take anything that is Christian away? it seems to me its ok to be any other religion in the US except Christian, and for your infomation i have NOTHING against muslims , jews, buddist etc they can worship any way they like it .. i just find it a bit cruel to build your mosac next to a place that a group of radical muslims killed 100's of people in the name of their god..

ARM:   Yes, they have their "rights" but if they had their way we'd have "no rights". I personally don't desire to wear a burka or land in jail because I go out in public w/o a male relative. They have a right to build a mosque anywhere but they should realize and I think they do, that address is a wee bit too close to "ground zero" The first thing they do when they think they have conquered a nation is put up a mosque in that place.  Already they stop traffic on Madison Ave in NYC and allow the Muslims to kneel in the STREET for their prayers. Do you realize how many mosques are presently in NY?   They are terribly insensitive to the people who lost loved ones in the Twin Towers. But then, thats not a surprise as they kill their own people even wives and daughters.......duh! “New York City has more than 100 mosques, compared with 10 in 1970, and more than 800,000 of its 8.21 million residents are Muslims, said Philip Banks III,” chief of the NYPD Community Affairs Bureau. 

WTF??  Conquered a nation??  I don't consider us "conquered" by ANY drunken stretch of the imagination - What is IN that Koolaid those people are drinking??

SSP:  and 6000 churches and 1000 synagogues, I did the same Google search as you (http://didyouknow.org/number-of-churches-and-mosques-in-new-york-city/). Look, ARM, I don't know you, and I love my cousins, and moreover, I respect your right to your opinion, but you are being hateful and ignorant!   At the interfaith summit held in Chicago after the September 11th attacks, leaders of the muslin, christian and jewish faiths came together and issued this statement: "As we have since 9/11 and the beginning of the war on terrorism: we call for greater understanding; we seek to dispel ignorance; we ask that this be a time of humility not arrogance; and, we hope that all can be mindful of what we have lost." (Reuters AlertNet).

Just so you KNOW, dozens of the people who died on September 11th WERE Muslim, including a number of who were working in the restaurant, and some on the planes, and some who worked for AMERICAN companies in the towers, and even in the Pentagon! Do you really think Muslims don't CARE about their lost ones the same way as the Christian ones do?? What about the Jews? or God forbid [pun??], the atheists? Surely you will permit them to mourn their losses?

Look, they close the banks and schools for Christian holidays like Easter and Christmas, what is wrong with throwing a few crumbs to another religion. Stopping traffic in NYC happens ALL the time...is it OK, 'cuz they are shooting Sex in the City, or celebrating Chinese New Year or St, Patricks Day, but NOT ok, OK cuz we are asked to show a little respect? Madison is not the only way Uptown!  You are NOT required to wear a burqa (proper spelling), BECAUSE you have the freedom to practice a religion where you don't HAVE to wear anything you don't want!! 

Lastly, plenty of Americans kill their wives and children...only here we call it a genteel name, "Domestic Violence" and casually avert our eyes when we see it happening to our friends and neighbors. Killing women and children is NOT just a Muslim "thing." I think Hitler and his cronies at the SS, Christians one and all, felt no remorse at killing women and children.  

The 19 attackers on September 11th killed thousands of people, not hundreds, and while there are plenty of bad ones, that does not mean the entire religion is evil and corrupt! That is what I take issue with! I am NOT attacking you.... I am simply asking you all to have the same tolerance and generosity and kindness that Christ asks of you. Why is that so impossible. Muslims do not want to take ANYTHING away from you!

Look if anyone has actually READ anything "real" on this story, you would know that, first of all, they don't even have the money to pay for the building!! They can't just HAVE the building. No one is NYC is going to GIVE it to them....so this whole MOSQUE thing next to a sacred burial ground is kinda silly.

So, that is it. I logged out of Facebook after that...I can't wait to see the maelstrom of  seething rage I've stirred up in the right wing block of my family.  Anyone wanna adopt me??

zucchini - it ain't just for Breakfast anymore

this one goes out to Keely, over at The Un Mom. My sister has QUITE the green thumb. Lord knows what she does with all these things, besides decorate her children, and make chocolate chip zucchini cake.....

Random Tuesday

this might actually be better tomorrow for wordless wednesday, but whatever....

Do Over

If I could do it ALL over, rather than being beautiful or rich or popular or brilliant (like I AM), I would trade it all to have the ability to do THIS....

 Click Me to see a YouTube Video that will make your eyes pop out of you head, in a GOOD way....

Wouldn't YOU??No, really, wouldn't you love to be this strong, this flexible, this beautiful????

i would...

now a whole separate post is needed for the "story" this dance tells.... look at HER face...and look at his!  completely different commitments to the relationship....she trys to keep him out, trys not to let him get under  his skin and he keeps pulling her in, until she is completely invested, trusting, immersed and blinded by her devotion to the feelings in her heart, she lets him get "under her skin," while he, once he gets her, remains careless and unattached, he gets by on brute strength, never needing to show a true feeling.......

powerful.  The choreographer needs a credit somewhere....

The Milk Challenge

Captain Dumbass poignantly recounted a tale of his new little boy, Finn and his most recent "spit up," and that reminded me of 4th of July last year.  

My family always gets together on the 4th in my aunt and uncle's back yard near Houston. I come from Arizona, my dad drives down from the the East Texas forest,  either my brother or my sister (and their kids) come in from MI or IN...My dad's sisters, and most of my first and second cousins from that particular branch of the family, AND all their kids, as well as various ex husbands, boyfriends, girlfriends (and the rare "partner" usually introduced as "my friend")!  Usually a screaming rabble in the pool, sometimes a bloody slide incident, 3 or 4 dogs underfoot, a few hardy souls jumping from the garage roof into the pool (though once one person does it, then all the little munchkins wanna do it too. The only rule is you have to be big enough to get yourself up the ladder), usually some sort of impromptu "talent" display, lots of delicious food, and then we all sit on the roof when the sun goes down to watch two different sets of fireworks.  

I have been attending with devout regularity since 1995, and it has really been cool watching my little cousins grow up. I imagine this is how MY aunts and uncles felt watching me and my brother and sister and first cousins when we were little.

Well, the times, they are a-changin.'  All them little third cousins are married now, and have their own children, which is fine and dandy, but some of those spouses, I tell ya, they have brought in an element that can only be described as "uncouth." Now, we are no puritan, perfect family by any means (most of them wildly profess to be Christian, and every so often one of them will erroneously ask me if I have a relationship with Christ....). 

We are definitely a red neck bunch of Cajuns, and mighty proud of it.  But these spouses...the ideas in their heads!? You have to wonder if perhaps they WERE dropped on their heads as babies, and not just disciplined with switches and belts like the rest of us!

My little third cousin C married this guy, W who seems like such a fine upstanding guy. They have made some beautiful babies, and C seems really happy (she recently had new boobs installed, so I think W is really happy too). So, last year, W, not content with the way things are decided to mix it up and introduced "The Milk Challenge"  He told us about this dumbass stunt, where you have drink a gallon of milk, and then keep it down for an hour.  Apparently, it is a real test of your manhood, like killing a deer or pulling a sword from a stone, so as we all watched in abject horror....several tried...and all failed. They all report the milk was still cold as it came back out.  Something about the Sorry about the incredibly gross, but vivid, photo. Show your children - let this be a cautionary tale for them so others don't have to suffer!!!  

I am thinking, men, what crazy nuts makes them do these things (oh yeah...crazy nuts...duhhh), when my cousin K decides SHE wants in......She drank about half, but she won't let herself throw up for some reason, so she just writhed on the grass for a long time....

kids....everywhere

I just had this huge rant about children, inspired by the children of my brother and sister, and those of two of my best friends, but I deleted it. Funnily enough, Ryan over at Pacing the Panic Room has a post on the rancor between he and his sister as children...Must be going around, huh?.  

I have no children, so I can't complain, but I am still convinced I would have made an awful good mama, and I have worked with more kinds of kids than most people can imagine, so I know some shit.  Can I just remind everyone that as early as a mere 100 years ago children were only brought into this world to work in our family business, or to work on the farms.  I read this great article in the New York Magazine that pointed out that as our lives have become easier, children have become more "precious" and the way we treat [read: coddle] them today is only because life is so much easier for us now.  100 years ago, children never got cars on their 16th birthday and never had phones and music players and fancy clothes.  And they rarely went to college! Only the truly gifted or fabulously wealthy could do it....so everyone is in financial crisis and I think I will choose to blame this ALL on children.  I don't have any, but I think my theory may be dead on.

 

I love my nieces and my nephews, but I am only in the periphery of their lives, if at all...a few days once a year, maybe a week? They don't need me, they don't remember the things I do for them, the presents I buy, and I don't know why - I remember my aunts as being such caring loving people all through my childhood, and even now, most of my aunts are my dearest friends....I don't know why I have such a burning desire to be in my siblings' childrens lives. They could care less I sometimes think, and sometimes I even think my brother and sister would prefer if I would leave them alone.

Whatever. I am feeling particularly cranky since I haven't been home since the end of June...and won't be for another week...I am in Michigan for another few days, then Chicago, then fly back to Houston to get my car and then maybe head home...Janie, if you are reading, maybe I will swing by Midland. You don't have any kids at HOME do ya????

the end

I went out yesterday morniing and the entire nest is destroyed...but no little egg shells...I am thinking some evil rat bastard of a lizard climbed up the bush and into the nest, devoured the eggs and trashed the nest. I am almost sad for the little crack ho birdie.  Survival of the fittest FER SHURE

tomorrow is my birthday. hope i don't get devoured by a lizard......

The Crack Ho is Back in Town

Hadn't seen the bird in a while...figgered she flew off in shame for leaving her unborn babies like THAT, so imagine my surprise when I went outside to water my dead bush (I thought I better, since it hasn't rained since March and probably won't again til July), and as I start spraying the dead leaves (and a few surprisingly hardy and beautiful flowers! click on this photo at left to see what i mean - seriously, NO water in 2 months!!) the bush shook to life and a bird flew up at my face.  I swatted madly, drenching myself in the process, and when I could breathe again, I noticed that little bitch had built ANOTHER damn nest on my patio...AND she had laid 2 eggs in it!

OK, the last time, she was relatively protected from the WILD in my window sill, behind the iron bars, but NOW she has precariously perched the HOME OF HER CHILDREN on the ledge of the patio. It is  a mere 3 inches wide, and somehow, she has managed to build it INTO the bush....which when watered made her home shake like it was built on the San Andreas fault.

Look, I love nature as much as the next guy, but seriously, WTF? Darwin truly knew what he was talking about when he mentioned survival of the fittest. This bird is an idiot, but she does have a bullheaded stubborn streak and a desperate will to procreate, I will give her that much....Maybe that's why I never had children.....always searching too hard for a nice safe haven to HAVE them, and never finding it, have arrived at this great age with my nest barren...

Let's see what the next few days bring. I know there is also a bunny burrowed into my patio...Although I probably flooded him out today, too.... and I someone told me they saw a rattle snake in the courtyard....I bet they just LOVE little eggs.

something borrowed...again

Auds over at Barking Mad is taking a bit of a respite, and since I am a lazy ass slacker I figured I would tag along...Just to be clear....she stole it from another blog I don't follow but which has some pretty KER-AZY shit on it.....

1. It's 2AM and you are not home. You are more than likely: well if I was 26, I would be at a gay disco on Miami Beach whooping it up.....but I ain't 26, and I am no where near Miami Beach...ahh to be young again....now if I am not home, or in a hotel on the road, you better activate my implanted homing device cuz there is NO telling where I have wandered off to!

2. What's the last thing you spent more than $100 on? My eye doctor this morning...sonuvabitch.....my retinas look like giant boobs with varicose veins. Before that, new shoes for my baby (aka my 1995 saturn)

3. What do your bank checks look like? hmmm little rectangle things...maybe tan? nothing special, and definitely FREE from the bank.

4. Where did the shirt you are currently wearing come from? Macys

5. Name something that will be on your Christmas wish list: A telescope and a propane stove.

6. What color is your toothbrush? ummm ya know, I don't think I know...oh yes, it is a Braun so it must be blue and white

7. Name something you collect and tell us about it. Patches - the kind you used to sew on back packs and denim jackets. I collect THESE instead of t-shirts from all the places I go since I was 18...much easier to tote around than the tshirts, AND they always fit!! Some day I plan to sew them on a blanket or something...I am missing a few, but I have over 200 from cities and states and countries I have visited. They are getting harder and harder to find!

8. Last restaurant you ate at. Who were you with? How was it? Bario Brewery. With a bunch of rocket scientists and aerospace experts (yawwwwnnn). The chicken quesadilla was great, but I am not a fan of diet RC.

9. Who was the last person you bought a birthday card for? bought? I don't buy cards. I MAKE cards! You want to buy one, email me!

10. What is your worst bad habit? Procrastinating and never finishing ANYTHING.

11. Name a magazine you subscribe to? Body & Soul.

12. Your favorite pizza toppings? Pepperoni, Pineapple and Jalapeno...all on the same pizza.

13. Whose number were you looking up the last time you used a phone book? Wow. man that takes me back...remember those things? gosh, I always used to check and see if my name was in there and how many people with my name there were....I can NOT remember the last time I used a phone book for its intended purpose....right now they fill an empty space in my pots and pans drawer

14. Other than family, who is the person that you love most? I am much too lazy to answer this - too much explanation would be required.

15. What is the last thing you cooked? Camping, I made THE most amazing pancakes ever known to man....

16. Name something you wouldn't want to buy used? Feminine hygiene products

17. Which shoe do you put on first? which ever one I grab first.

18. What is the last thing you remember losing? I don't think it counts, cuz I don't lose things, and I don't get lost...but this IS pretty funny in retrospect

19. What is the ugliest piece of furniture in your house? compared to what? the only matching furniture is in the bed room.....everything else has just been accumulated

20. Last thing you bought and ended up returning? I bought a flashlight, and it didn't work so I am bringing it back tomorrow! piece of CRAP!!

21. What perfume/cologne do you wear? If none, why? I like Samsara and Hypnotic Poison, but they frown on perfume at the gym, and that it the only place I go...so just a spritz of something by apothecary keeps me smelling yummy

22. Your favorite board game? Scrabble. I play with my self sometimes....

23. What was the last board game you played? see above

24. Where did your vehicle come from? The dealer - my first new car....1994...it was the first car sold for the new year...boy was I a sucker, but I think I have gotten my money's worth.

25. If a movie was made about your life what would the theme song be? "Sara Smile" by Hall and Oates.

26. You're sad, who can cheer you up easily? Generally, no one tries.....and it is better that way - I don't like being told to cheer up, or be reminded that OTHERS are worse off than me. I drag myself up or sit here and mope til I feel better...as I said, I play with myself.....

27. What was the color of the bridesmaid dresses of the last wedding you went to? I think they were peach...I only had eyes for someone not in the wedding party.....NO...they were white with big Purple and pink and peach sashes....

28. What house cleaning chore do you hate to do the most? Dusting and cleaning the shower.

29. What is your favorite way to eat chicken? In a cheese quesadilla...

30. It is your birthday. You hope the cake is? It will be whatever I want....see #26