before and after

2 pm Tuesday

what is the deal with posting photos???

I was in Michigan for work this past week. I was scheduled to
leave on Tuesday afternoon with a connection in Denver.....that never happened, thanks to an amazing "lake effect" snow.

I got an extra night at my sisters with her kids...but I missed the Memorial for the shooting victims.

4pm Tuesday

Look at this blue sky view from Safeway Wedneday afternoon.....

Gabby Giffords

can someone please explain to me what is going on in the world? I mean, we don't  know if this guy was just some nut job off his meds, or if his actions were politically motivated, but if Jared Loughner is an example of the youth of today deal with situations, then we are FUCKED for sure!  Should we now be afraid of asserting our first amendment right!  Is someone going to SHOOT me because I said George W was a friggin' idiot and that the invasion was WRONG.....How about because I am considering buying a FOREIGN car next time??

I don't pray in the conventional sense, but what passes for them are being said, thought and felt for Gabrielle Giffords now. I am very proud to say that I voted for this amazing woman.

promises promises

I am entering another contest, since I "really" have nothing else to do.....My work in Michigan is almost over and tomorrow night i can try and relax with my sissy and her crazy kids. 

To enter the contest you have to share what some of your better choices will be for 2011...I have many that aren't publishable, but there are some I can share. If YOU want to enter the contest for a $100 girft card, check out this link.  Auds at Barking Mad is one of my most favorite writers!!

whooo hooo!!!

happy new year

so i am a little late wishing any remaining readers happy holidays...however, my life is a bit of a whirl wind this time of year...boring stuff, but keeps me in frequent flyer points, and so far I have avoided the groping, but just wait....in the next 4 weeks, they will have many many more opportunities to fondle me.

i am with my sissy, the SWWM, but it has been lovely so far. Me and my niece shoveled the snow today, and hopefully the roads will be clear tomorrow so we can go to my conference....

My other niece is worth an entire blog post but I am just toooo tired......

my sister doesn't feed them enough apparently

ho ho

the last few weeks have seen  me aiming in the decidedly GRINCH direction.  Thanks to Ryan at Pacing the Panic Room, who pointed me at the Bloggess. Not that many people read my blog, but if you happen upon it, please go see what she has done....it will BLOW you away.....She is actually the kind of writer I wish I were, but more importantly, she is the person we ALL wish we could be!

now excuse me, while I go pack up my Grinch-itude and try to have a better outlook on the season....

Happy and Merry

wasting away again in margarita-ville

my phone ring tone is Jimmy Buffet's quintessential chill song...and funnily enough, I am not really a fan of Buffet, and even though I lived in Ft. Lauderdale a while, and my mom has lived there since 1984, I had never been to Key West.  Figured it wasn't much more to fuss about than the New Orleans' French Quarter (been there), San Diego's Old Town (been there); Galveston's Strand (been there), New York's Greenwich Village (been there), San Francisco's Haight (been there), Paris' Latin Quarter (been there) and any one of a hundred other quaint little tourist traps... I have been there and I have the t-shirt!

So, back in June, when mom asked me to go to Key West with her and a couple friends over Thanksgiving, I wasn't too enthused but said "sure".....Something better was bound to come up and I totally forgot about it...until October when she asked when I was arriving...oops... and had I made the hotel reservations she had requested (back in June). Double Oops.  So I got on the stick, cashed in a frequent flyer award and made a triple point earning booking at a nice hotel where I get upgrades and free stuff.

My  mother and me, together.....can we just say that I may not have coined it, but I LIVE the phrase, "if it's not one thing, it's your mother."  She is a strong, beautiful, creative woman, who can handle anything. In fact I have never seen her cry...Indeed, I rarely see her have any emotion at all.  She has the ability to make me cry with just a word and I DO live in fear. I spill water on the floor and cringe that she will say something scathing. I broke a lamp one time and called a friend to see if she could take me to the airport (3 days early). I think it all goes back to when I was about 6 years old and my sister accidentally broke a plate or something, and my mother RIPPED the leg off her dolly and said something like "you don't take care of my things, so I am not going to take care of yours."  

Anyway, I always let these things go and go forward with hope and optimism, and while more often than not, I am punished for my naivete, this time it wasn't so bad.  She only made me cry 3 times in an entire week!!!  it was actually a fun time, and I won't need reconstructive surgery on the inside of my cheek. Nor will my tongue have to be stitched completely back on.....

Here are a few photos of the trip...more to come when I figure out to upload them from my new camera....

me and mom and her friends at thanksgiving dinner - Pier House

Conch Chowder and fruit plate with no honeydew - Give Thanks!

do i really need to write a caption?

we have our moments...

Thanks for a great trip, Margarita....(not that she reads my blog.....thank god)

Yeah - What Irish Said

This is what i would have said, if I wasn't so damn lazy....

 Of course, it wouldn't have been as WELL written, but the thoughts and feelings are the same.

THANKS IRISH!!!

the walls are crumbling

All around me, walls are crumbling. Life is folding in in so many horrible ways for my friends this week..

In summary,

Sweet DB found out her 5 month fetus didn't have a brain and had to be induced on Saturday...

JM had cancerous lumps removed from her breast on Monday...

Granny Janny had her foot amputated Tuesday due to complications of MRSA, and diabetes....

and some of my blog friends are also going through really tough times

I don't have enough tears for all this. There are times, rare but occasional, that I really had some kind of faith....

In a slightly lighter, if twisted vein, I have a great suspicion that I will be arrested on Dec. 1 coming back from Ft. Lauderdale (They have the NudeOScopes at the airport and I am absolutely NOT going through it and if anyone tries to touch MY junk, I will scream bloody murder......)  watch the news on 12/2, cuz  you might see me....

Set sail for adventure, indeed

As a former employee of a company that provided those singin' and dancin' shows on board cruise ships, perhaps I am just a wee bit biased, but what the hell is the big deal about those POOR people on the cruise ship Splendor and their 4 day "ordeal." Boo Fucking Hoo. They had to eat Spam and pop tarts and walk UP and down stairs.  ohhhhh, so sad.....this cataclysm It RUINED your birthday. This catastrophe turned your 2nd Honeymoon into a Nightmare.

Do you realize how many of those 4,500 people were just trying to do their job?  More than 1,200 people WORK on that ship! Talk about lousy working conditions in general (the crew bar is usually way below sea level, no one has a porthole, and we used to call the hall behind the kitchens "Slime Alley").  Crew doesn't eat the same food as passengers, trust me, and they don't get to do shore excursions (unless they are the performers and their agent arranged a really good deal with the producer)...

I am so sick of hearing  "Oh, I couldn't take a shower!"  "There was nothing to doooo."  "It was too cold to lay out on the deck." "We couldn't go in the pool."  Wahh wahh wahhh.  At least, all of the passengers are going to get their money back AND a free cruise.  What will the employees, who had to suffer through this HELL just as much as the paying guests.  Will they get any workman's comp for this trauma?  MOST of them live below decks  - passenger elevators don't even go down the 10 levels or MORE that are for kitchens and crew living and engines etc.  Down there, until the emergency generators came on, it was probably pitch black!  I can see some post traumatic stress cases arising from having to deal with that kind of a situation.

This was an ACCIDENT.  ACCIDENTS happen. Get over it. No one died, and everyone, except the crew, is going to make out like a bandit.....

In Memory of the Buffs

I was a freshman at CU back in the early 80s, then went back there for graduate school...but since then haven't been a real fan of college football....But NOW that CU will be part of the PAC 12 with a chance of seeing my boys here in Tucson, and it being so chilly here today, thought I would share a little ditty I wrote when I was going to school in Santa Barbara....

The biting chill of autumn days

Puts football in my veins.

Though far away and out of sight,

The memory remains.

We infiltrate the stadium

To cheer our padded boys.

A winning score is not our aim -

Just making lots of noise.

Drowning out the marching band,

The hot dogs and the beers.

The paper planes and making up

Of dirty obscene cheers.

Yelling at the referee,

The passing up of bodies,

Sipping spiked hot chocolate drinks -

Those minty flavored toddies.

The crunching of the shoulder pads,

The grunts and yellow flags,

Even though we never win,

Our ardor never lags.

We know the team will lose the game,

But still we love our Buffs,

Even though we rant and rave,

and call them "Powderpuffs".

But one rare time, we were surprised.

We won the victory crown.

Frenzied and ecstatic,

We tore a goal post down.

Though now the field is far away

And icy winds blow through,

The echo of our chant lives on -

"We love you, dear C.U."

Wordless Wednesday

if a picture is worth a thousand words, other than the cigarette, this pretty much sums up my feelings for the last few days

no sleep for YOU

so here is the tale.....I went to bed on Thursday night at midnight and woke up at 2 with a bloody nose that bled and bled...It finally stopped and I tried to get back to sleep, as I knew I had a busy weekend ahead and would be staying up all night on Friday to write an overnight play.  No such luck...no sleep for YOU.  So, I got up and worked til 8am, went to Pilates (I almost feel asleep on Double Leg Kick), then had breakfast with my classmates - no coffee, as i thought I might take a nap. 

No Nap for you!!  The phone rang...and after I turned it off and tried to close my eyes, my cell phone rang, and i couldn't turn it off as it was my alarm clock.  So, by the time I left the house, I was tired and cranky. I went to the Play in a Day presentation show on Friday night, where I was randomly assigned to another writer to write a 10 minute play, to be turned in by 6am.  So, I bought some diet Dr Pepper and headed to Nancy's for a war of the wills on writing a play with someone you don't know. 

Now, I am not much of a team player in the first place. I work from home, my sports are pilates and walking, I like working alone, which is funny considering my life in theatre...BUT I was ready to be a collaborator - apparently SHE wasn't...long story short, we went with my idea and turned in a play at 5:30am that I was actually quite proud of, and as a director, thought I could do a good job with it.  So, I laid down in her guest room to try and grab a couple hours sleep before I had to go to the JDRF walkathon (I raised over $2,000 thanks to my friends and family!! Click Here to see my progress chart and hear the cheers and whistles!!)...and my fucking cell phone rang at 6:30 - a friend calling to make sure I had turned in my play, and then at 745, I got a text from the girl I was walking with....so I gave up....

I took a shower and went to the walkathon, which we finished in an hour, and then I went to check in to the Doubletree.  Felt all my hard work deserved a nice relaxing night in a hotel, and I laid down to try to sleep.  My cell phone AGAIN, rang, and it was my mother. We talked until my phone starting dying and I thought GREAT - now I can sleep...and as I drifted off, the GOD DAMN FRONT DESK called to make sure my room was ok!!!  AGHHHHHHHHHHHH

So, I got up, and figured I would go get some dinner or something before I had to pick up my friend who was coming to see the performance of all the 10 minute plays that had been created the night before, and I could charge my phone in the car...but the CHARGER was broken...something about keeping it on the floor under my feet probably had something to do with it getting bent, I assume...So, I drove all the way home to get my phone charger.  I charged it a while and then left to get Kevin. I backed the car out of the garage, and as I shifted into Drive, it DIED.  It sounded like it WANTED to turn over, but just couldn't.  I am PANICKED!  I could miss the play, but all my stuff was at the hotel, and I had a thing to do down down on Sunday...

My neighbor said maybe it was the battery, but I didn't think so, cuz the lights and everything were fine and it was TRYING to turn over...(and as this post attests, I KNOW battery issues). I was pretty sure it was the alternator for some reason.  They helped me push it back up in the driveway, and my neighbor drove me to the theatre.

Once there, I had a whole slew of friends there to support my awesome play...and folks, the director and actors SUCKED big loads of CRAP and missed everything we had written, including the very blatant stage directions we had included to make sure certain bits were clear, and funny...I WAS so embarrassed, and when it was over, I leaned over to my friends and said, "you do not need to vote for mine to win."  The other plays were not really much better, but at least the acting was not so poor and you could understand what was going on.  At the end, yeah, mine did not win.  As a director, I have won 4 of the previous 6 times I participated, and if I had directed this script, it would have won....sigh. so, NO prize for YOU

My friend K drove me back to the hotel from the theatre, stopping at the store so I could pick up snacks for my Sunday event, then he came up and we talked until 2am - yes I would have preferred to either sleep or jump his bones, but since he's not that into me, and I know it, I took what I could get, and that was talk.  I confirmed breakfast with the front desk, since I had gotten a coupon for the awesome breakfast...11am - and YES, the hotel shuttle could take me to campus for my event! COOL...I could sleep til 10 (almost 8 hours), have a great breakfast and leisurely make it to the University with no trauma.....

watch the news and catch up on email.  Around 930, I called down to see if there was a crowd at breakfast and they said, no, it was really thinning out SINCE IT ENDED AT 10!

Fuck

So I showered and dressed and ran down to gulp in some eggs and bacon. They were out of fruit and yogurt, and the french toast was "limp" and they only had cheese danish...bleah.....

I was in too poor a mood to go sit in the hot tub, so I took the shuttle to campus, lugging my computer, my over night bag, 2 giant bags of chips, and a milk crate full of juice boxes, and my purse and water bottles.  I had a class with 35 unruly 8 - 12 year olds, and then took the lot of them to the planetarium, where I had hoped for a nice relaxing cool place where I could drop into a short nap...NO, they had a LASER show going....loud music, pulsing lasers...NO SLEEP FOR YOU!!!!

After everyone left. I kinda sat there...and then I realized I had no way to get home.....and not even any cash for a cab, and finally I burst into tears.......I sucked it up and called C, the guy who dumped me, saying he just wanted to be friends. And he said he would come get me...he lives 10 minutes away.  FIFTY minutes later he shows up and when we get to my house we take a look at my car.  It actually turned over the second try but before my elation could hit, he is screaming turn it off, as I notice black smoke rising from the hood.  The burning smell he figures is the serpentine, and I say, I still think it is the alternator causes all this, but he insists a pulley is out of alignment or something, so he takes the serpentine off...and all the pulleys spin fine...except  (guess!) the ALTERNATOR!.  He figures something has happened to the bearings in there.  We move the car to the garage, since now it starts like a 2010 model. He hangs out for a while, and then he left, I ate dinner and went to bed at 9am...And yes, I took a sleeping aid and left my cell phone in the other room.  I slept til 8....and now I am trying to get prices on getting this thing fixed.....

So here is my silver lining......at least it died at home...at least I drove up here to get my phone charger, otherwise I would have been stranded at the hotel, or worse, downtown at 10pm Saturday night, with NO PHONE.....

 

well?

Happy Halloween

Halloween has ALWAYS been my favorite holiday. Whether it was the dressing up, or the taboo candy grubbing, I don't know. Somewhere in my mid 20s or 30s, I lost the urge. I went to parties here and there, but once there was no candy involved, and no mama to make me a cool costume, I guess it lost its flair. Last year, I decided I wanted that MOJO back, so I had my first party in 20 years.  The last party I had was 1989, I lived in these dive-y apartments on Powerline in Ft. Lauderdale. We had a pool, I had a blender, my sister brought pina colada and strawberry daiquiri mix and my own father brought the rum. A few friends came over, my roommate and her boyfriend, the neighbors, some random assholes from across the street....We had a blast - I was pretty screaming drunk, but I remember it WAS a fun time...(and no, my car disappearing a few months later had NOTHING to do with this!).

So, it had been a while since I "hosted" a party. I thought, "high time," (not like THAT, you dope), I put the word out, and I'll be damned if a butt load of people showed up, including TWO babies!  It was great! At one point, there were people DANCING in my living room - now that is cool, right?

I have decided to take fate into my hands and do it again tomorrow night.  So far, about 10 or 11 have RSVP'd, so who knows?  I guess I better start thinking about a costume...and some food!  I do have the soundtrack:

a good song for Halloween

another one

another one for you die hard fans

Hope you all have a spooktacular weekend!!

random chance

By some odd chance, a friend posted a video on her Facebook today...and it was the FIRST video I ever saw, back in 1980...on Teletunes, which came BEFORE MTV in Denver, on KBDI, Broomfield Public Access...(MTV later bought Teletunes which I always thought was odd, but now that CORPORATIONS OWN America, I see the logic), and it was all helter skelter and psycho schizoid, new wave, alternative music choices from there....Depeche Mode, Yaz, Soft Cell, Split Enz, New Order, Fiction Factory, Love and Rockets, Tin Tin, Bauhaus, Blancmange, Erasure, Ministry, OMD, Shriekback, Tones on Tail, Icehouse, Japan, Spandau Ballet...god the list goes on....

So what misplaced 4 minute dirge from days gone by do I blame my current music tastes on? Easy:  Classix Nouveaux Guilty - click here to see the video!  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vCLqj0X2AFk

ok, my Pandora is rockin' a little old school now.  So, what framed YOUR music choices of today?

Walk a mile (or 3.2 to be exact) in MY shoes

Every year, I make it my mission to raise money for the Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation. The organization came into existence a year or two before I was diagnosed in 1974, I think, and the walkathons and fundraising began shortly thereafter. I've walked, biked, skied and roller skated more miles, over the last 30-odd years, so that for me to "expect" my name to be included on the "registered walkers" list (not that I am in the general habit of expecting anything), is NOT too much to ask! I register on line months in advance....I do a fancy letter, and I do email campaigns, and I raise a good chunk of money - this year, more than ever before, perhaps in part to my little video

In fact, as an individual, I raise more than many family groups here in Tucson....and they have cute little kids to use as bait. Of course, some raise tons more money, but I guess if you are a lawyer or stockbroker, you have lots of contacts to strongarm ask, and the, there are the corporate teams who have companies who will match their gifts - they always raise a good chunk. Me, I just ask friends and family, most who have supported my cause over the years, and while I don't raise TONS of money, as I said, I do raise more than the average individual walker.

And yet, when I go to check in on the morning of the walk for four years in a row, my NAME was not even on the list as being registerd to walk! What the hell is that? I don't want the plaque they give everyone who raises over $1,000...I have several - I don't need a physical token of appreciation, but I'd just like to have my name on the friggin' list....One year, I WAS on the list, and it showed how much I had raised. The girl checking me in, looks up, her eyes huge, and she said, "Wow, you have raised more than anyone I have checked in today," and then she said, THANK YOU. And THAT, my friends, that was what I was waiting for. Someone to say THANK YOU. Sure, I am raising money to find a cure for a disease I have, so it may seem a little self-serving, but it isn't really. 

See, I could easily make my personal donation of $50 or $100 and feel pretty good, and be done with it.  However, I have the "ability" to USE myself, and raise tens times more...People give to people, not causes, and my friends and family support the JDRF because of ME (or another diabetic they know). It isn't like I make a personal donation of $1,500, but the fact that my begging and pleading with my friends and family result in this chunk of money, that might not otherwise have been raised, and for someone to say, THANK YOU, to me, for doing it, makes it mean so much more.

So, I am walking, again (since they haven't managed to find a cure YET), on November 6th....and we will see, won't we?  Will my name be on the list, or will I have to walk in a snarly mood?

If you are a reader of my blog, and you are one of the people who donated, THANK YOU - I love you, and your support of my cause means more to me than just the monetary value!  If you haven't seen my little video, please check it out...You don't have to donate...just watch it and maybe share it.....like the most awesome blogger in the world, The King of New York Hacks (thanks King!!). If you found my blog thanks to the King's lovely post, welcome...I hope my ranting, raving and griping and moaning don't scare you off.....

And if JDRF can figure out a way to get my name on the LIST, I will even be a happy girl for a few hours!!!  I don't know if I will be able to stand being happy.....but let's not put the cart before the horse....

we're walking, we're walking

I've said it before, but it is worth repeating when it isn't 109 degrees outside.  The desert is really quite a lovely place to live...and while I don't mean it would be a nice place for a summer home (which it isn't, unless you like the heat, and I do, so in my case, I guess it IS a nice place for a summer home), and you sure can't mind the scorpions, the rattlesnakes or the tarantulas (actually The UnMom might actually like the free spider access - getting them in your banana basket it totally up to you, however)! And the snowbirds here rival those in Ft. Lauderdale (although we don't have nearly as many Canadians, not that there is anything wrong with being Canadian, but can you imagine our poor local police trying to profile illegal Canadians?)

Last night, I actually had my camera with me on my 4 mile walk in the canyon.  I have no frickin' idea why these are sideways!  I went through and right side upped them ALL.....what the hell?  but you get the idea.....

what I love most about the saguaro is that is looks like it flipping the world off!!

even arthritic fingers need to give the finger every once in a while

can you see the old man in the rock?

 

It is the small things

The little things in life make me happy:  

~ An extra cherry in my amaretto sour without asking for it and feeling like a 4 year old. 

~ Actually getting NO onions on my burrito when I order "a bean burrito, no onions, please."

~ A free drink coupon from Starbucks after for buying 20 drinks

~ Getting to pick airplane seat from the GOOD seats up front.

~ Waking up before my alarm and feeling good about it.

~ Getting a bear claw, but only being charged for a donut.

~That last $10 donation putting me over the top on my fundraising for JDRF. (Click the link to hear the cheers and yahoos...it is quite gratifying!)

~ My car turning over to 123,456 while I am not in the middle of the construction zone, (though I HAD been up until 123455.5) and staying this way in my garage ALL night, so i can be excited about it again tomorrow

.
and to hear me actually get all verklempt about it, watch the little video...

what are YOU doing??

I am watching the extraction of those trapped miners in Chile, and it is the most amazing wonderful thing I have seen in months and months, maybe years.  If you are not watching this, you should be.  Turn off the politics; turn off the "gnus," turn off your cell phone, take the kids Wii away and WATCH THIS NOW........

Seeing the face of the woman as her husband came out was simply a moment of joy that is so rarely seen, and you really don't want to say you MISSED this because you had something "else" to do...Really?  what ELSE do you have to do?

I am crying, but for the first time in I don't know how long, it is a GOOD cry....

CLICK HERE for a live feed

politics ain't the only thing sucking around here.....

So, my profession, my avocation and my vocation, indeed, my very PASSION has always been theatre...I have two degrees from high fallutin' universities; I have a credible and almost distinguished resume - and am proud of the work I have done all over the country.  However, after a blistering, morale shattering experience last year with a show I directed downtown, I have found myself not even wanting to go see shows, let alone direct anything, and I haven't even auditioned for a show!   I saw a few great shows in NYC last winter, but the few things I have seen locally have all been SO BAD, that I kicked myself for even going!  I thought, I need to snap out of this...I LOVE theatre, so I dragged myself to the theatre last night - it was an "Old Time Radio" style thing.  

I took a friend who had moved to town recently, and we dragged her husband along too.  The group has been doing this radio thing for well over a year, so my expectations were perhaps a bit high, I suppose, but oh MY god, it was just SO sad.....unrehearsed, horrible useless sound effects, weak acting, and an ineffective director sitting in the front row supposedly "cueing" things, when neither actors or sound techs ever looked up from the script!  AND a really really poor script on top of it.....The did a McGee and Molly (?) style thing, but not one of the actors catured the twang and zip of "doll" "sis" "lissen here" "sayyyy..."  it was just so FLAT....

I went to "Old Time Radio" drama, wanting to close my eyes and imagine being cozied up to the wireless, but frankly I was scared to close my eyes for fear I would fall asleep - my FRIEND and her husband did, and the only reason I didn't was because I dug a hole in my arm with my finger nail.  An acquaintance was the playwright...and two guys I have directed in other projects were in it....and they were just horrible!!!!  I ducked out a side door quickly at the end

Sigh...and THAT is the state of the arts in Tucson......