Mommy Dearest

My roommate from my sophomore year at CU is having more angst with her evil mom, Skeletor. I thought I would share the most recent skirmish between me and my own Mommy Dearest (who I really do love and miss, but man, sometimes....to the moon!)

I called her 3 sundays ok and we were chatting as usual, and since I had just lost my lead actress, I must have sounded a little bummer and she asked what was wrong, so i told her. Instead of saying "I'm sorry," or "what happened" or "that stupid cow," my mother said, "oh that's too bad, and how are things working out with your set designer" (who, the week before made me almost turn in my resignation and I had called to cry about what an evil prick he was).... When she asked how that was, I felt like she was trying to point out how, apparently I was unable to get along with ANYBODY, which is patently untrue...So I changed the subject. I simply said, "hey, how's the weather in Ft.Lauderdale?" and we carried on the conversation about the weather and then we talked about her coming out to see the show - I looked up some fares on line, we settled on some dates and she said, go ahead and book those...and we hung up

A couple hours later, I called her again:

Me: Hey mom, I was calling to say I was sorry I changed the subject to abruptly earlier. I was not in the mood to talk about it, and it really felt like you were pouring salt in the wound by pointing out that I had also lost my set....

Mommy Dearest: [SARCASTIC RANT VOICE ON] Oh I am SO sorry you felt like I was pouring salt in your delicate little wound. BLAHBLAH BLAH MY friends, if they don't want to talk about....

Me: but I was calling to say I was...

MD... something, they will just SAY, hey let's not talk about that and we can change the subject BLAHBLAH BLAH and on and on and on....

Me: I was calling to say I was SORRY you BITCH!! click

Then I didn't talk to her for 2 weeks! and that was hard, cuz as oil and water like as we are, we still talk on a regular basis...adn god damn it, SHE was the one who was the bitch and needed to call me!! My sister said she had the story completely different (I happen to have an EXCELLENT memory and am quite sure of the conversation - even the "blahblah" parts)

I finally caved - we chatted superfically - never mentioned the row or the bitch word, and didn't mention the visit that I did NOT book. It is ALWAYS me that apologizes and I am SICK of being sorry. I am the way I am because of the way SHE raised me, so why do I have to sy I am sorry????

THEN I find out she has a 10 day trip to see my sister and her kids over Thanksgiving and another 10 day trip planned to see my brother and his new baby (which was due 2 days ago and still hasn't popped - his wife is MISERABLE). She was gonna give me a lousy three days, which frankly, might be 2 days too long....I hate that I just said that, but no one makes me as insane as my mother....All the guys I have dated have done less damage than my mother....She didn't mention the trip and since she never sent me a check for the ticket, I can only assume she knows I didn't book it. Maybe i ought to ANYWAY and see if she uses it? I could sit at the airport and wait for her....

At least I don't have kids for her to scar like poor old Briana...but I tell ya....If it's not ONE thing, it's your MOTHER....check that - if it's not one thing, it's MY Mother